Tuesday, January 31, 2006

I have no life

Seriously. To wit: my cable has been out for over 24 hours now, and I am slightly mortified by how this has made me fret and fidget in agony as if I've suffered an amputation. I missed Skating with Has-Beens! I missed 24! How will I catch up? Although: probably Jack punched out some bad guys, and CTU thought they had everything under control...and then they didn't! Dun dun DUN!

I bet the local cable guys are crapping their pants hoping to get this resolved by Sunday, though, with the Seahawks in the Super Bowl. If Seattle t.v. goes down for that, Comcast will have to be on the lookout for snipers, I expect.

Thursday, January 05, 2006

There's oversharing, and then there's...this

I have been so remiss in my posting, neglecting any sort of holiday letter or 2005 recap for y'all. But that's okay, because possibly the most astonishing Holiday Letter EVER was forwarded to me this year. I won't tell by whom; I don't want to incriminate anyone. Suffice to say, the sender is elderly but...vigorous. He sent a single-spaced, legal-size, double-sided letter to a vast cavalcade of friends and family, and buried in its exhaustive recounting was this paragraph:

On Tuesday of Holy Week, March 22, my urination began to turn off. The urologist found no reason for the symptom. In the early morning of Easter Monday at the hospital ER the doctor diagnosed me as having a case of shingles in the genital and anus area of my body, which turned out to be the cause of my urine failure. I had a bag and went through self urination for about 10 weeks before I gained full relief. It was a debilitating and frustrating time. But I recovered without long term problems. Thanks be to God!

May we all have a joyful and prosperous 2006, free of troubles up to and including ass shingles, my friends. Praises Be!

Also, somebody needs a blog, methinks.