Science can make life worth living: a North Carolina man has figured out how to bake extra caffeine directly into donuts (and bagels). Clearly he is the Einstein of the 21st century.
According to the article, he is not yet selling the Cornholio specials directly, but is marketing them to some of the big chains. What he ought to do, though, is open a franchise right here on the NerdCo campus. He could amass a fortune of supervillain proportions, and Mike and I would probably be punching and kicking strangers and perhaps even each other over the first place in line.